Standing Our Ground

Standing one’s ground has become a term used in our generation synonymous with breaking news headlines. Someone turns on an intruder or would be robber and instead of being overcome, they thwart the attacker. 

However, this scenario is not uncommon in the spiritual realm. The enemy, the devil, intrudes upon the children of God in an attempt to kill, steal and destroy (John 10:10). 

In Ephesians 6:10-18, Paul the Apostle writes that the children of God, the Church, have been given insight into our identity in Christ and instructions on how to fight back against the oppression when the enemy attacks.

The writer says, “… after you have done everything to stand v. 13), but what does that look like and practically mean for you and me, to do everything to stand? Perhaps it is actively serving, being present for others, avoiding conflict, keeping the peace, staying rested, hydrated, regularly meditating, reading the Bible and praying and forgiving others. This is doing ‘all to stand firm,’ and we can certainly add to this list. 

The attacks are going to come because the war is raging. We can sense it in the atmosphere and we know by the Word of God that these are the signs of the end times. Yet, we can have hope, and we can be strong and alert in prayer and in peace.

Acceptance, A Spiritual Principle

 I am not blaming anyone or anything for my condition but accept my fallen and sinful state as an addict. Although there are troubles and challenges as the day is long, I have come to believe that Christ wants to heal me and restore me sanity. 

There was a time though that I needed to play 'the blame game,' in order to soften the blow to my own conscience. But, by denying my own treachery I hindered my own recovery by not accepting the truth of my relapsed condition and worse, the hypocrisy of my testimony. Unbeknownst to me, acceptance was the exact spiritual principle I needed.  I had to admit to myself that something was seriously wrong in my life. That I had created a mess of my life and that my using spilled over to the lives of my loved ones. I admitted this and quit trying to play games with myself anymore and that my life had become unmanageable in many ways. It was not under my control anymore. I did things that I later regretted doing and told myself that I would not do it again. But I did. I kept on doing them, in spite of my regrets, my denials, my vows, my cover-ups and my facades.  I was a Christian Crackhead, living a double life as my addiction had become bigger than me. 

As such, the first step was to admit the truth of where I was, that I was really powerless over drugs, my feelings, and that I needed help. 

In order to move forward I had to accept, then as I do today, not to place fault or accuse someone or some group or situation. My daily prayer is, "Forgive us our trespasses as we forgive others."  

I Am On The Receiving End

Its been a long, hard road. At this point in my salvation and in my recovery, I am coming to accept that there is nothing good in me except the goodness of God, and what I receive, one day at a time from Him. After all, I have been indoctrinated with the humanist belief that I must pull myself up by my own bootstraps, put my best foot forward, "make it a great day," and tell myself, "I got this." All of the well-meaning mantras and good-intentions from psychologists have not understood this one thing, at least for me, is that when I accepted Christ as Lord, I emptied myself out and asked for His life and His power, and trusted that, "It is no longer I that live but Christ in me," Galatians 2:20) The old self, which is unbelieving, rebellious, and loving sin, died with Christ, supernaturally, but it us not until now that I am beginning to understand although I search for strength, ability, talent, and even greatness in my self, that mission is fruitless. It is in God alone in whom I live and move and have my being Acts 17:28.

I am an empty vessel, and I need to go and be filled (2 Kings 4:3-5), I cannot replenish myself. My salvation is not designed to be autonomous or self-reliant, I need Christ and His body to thrive. With this On this day, at the point of my journey, I am truly humbled and encouraged. All the striving and efforts but seemingly gaining little ground, as the sowing I have done in the flesh has reaped all that it ever could, frustration, because my hope and my life is not what I make of it, but it is what I have received.

He Loves Me, He Loves Me Not vs. Real Faith

I remember that childhood game we used to play with flowers. We would pull its petals going in tandem saying, “He loves me, he loves me not, he loves me, he loves me not.” With each petal pulled, resolving to leave our fate to the outcome of random chance.

That was a childish game but even more childlike is to pray that same way. At one moment we pray with belief, and the next we are in doubt. Our faith at times is like that flower game, “He loves me - the Lord, He loves me not.” Oh, but for the Grace of God! 

We are to always believe, always to pray, and always to give thanks. The Word says, “Without faith it is impossible to please Him, for he who comes to God must believe that He is, and that He is a rewarder of those who diligently seek Him (Hebrews 11:6). Now that’s real faith. That’s mature and tried faith.  But wait, there’s more, the Word also says,  “Let him ask in faith with no doubting, for he who doubts is like a wave of the sea driven and tossed by the wind. For let not that man suppose that he will receive anything from the Lord,” (James 1:6-7).

So, I decide that I will not have the, “He loves me, he loves me not,” kind of faith, but have that grounded and well established faith that comes from a heart surrendered in full assurance of the goodness of the Lord.

We Have Value, We Are Loved

 How many times have I felt that I needed to accomplish something in order to have value. It is so human to think that successes, jobs, wealth, knowledge, friendships, associations, my appearance, and most of all, my feelings, were indicators of my worth. But in reality, as a child of God, my worth comes from belonging to the Lord. 

Christians are called His children, as 1 Peter 2:9 says, “But you are a chosen people, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, the people belonging to God, that you may declare the praises of Him who called you out of darkness into His marvelous light.”

So it is not that we are valuable because we receive a job promotion, or because we accumulate a few dollars in the bank, or because someone says, “I love you,” but it is because God has declared that we are His very own.

Therefore, my thought is no longer, “I must be valuable because have been blessed, but it is I am valuable because God says so, hallelujah! Even better, whether the blessings come or not, I’m still loved.

For we walk by faith and not by sight (2 Cor. 5:7).

The Sword Is Weighty

 The sword that we wield is a weighty sword. Like a natural sword, the Word is powerful and able to strike down  formidable enemies, mighty strong holds, and is sharper than any two-edged sword. But we do not have to do it alone. We are not sent on the battlefield without support. We fight with the power of the Holy Spirit. 

David was strengthened by the Lord when cutting off the head of Goliath, and Jael, the woman in the Song of Deborah, who brought down the enemy with a spike. Both were empowered by the Lord. Our victories too require the power of God, walking in His wisdom, and in His strength. Christ says to bring our cares and lay them on His shoulders, assuring us of His available strength saying, “His yoke is easy and His burden is light” (Matt. 11:30).

We were never meant to live the Christian life defenseless. We were never designed to go it alone. Life takes courage and confidence. We need the wisdom and strength of the Lord as we move forward each day. In Christ, we have the power of the Holy Spirit and the Sword of the Spirit, which is the Word of God, to win the victory in each battle, one day at a time.

She Wields the Sword

On this wonderful Saturday towards the end of January on brand new year, the question is, why does she wield the sword? She wields the sword because it cuts through the chains of darkness, grief and heaviness and it bares the standard of victory.

The Bible says the Word is sharper than a two-edged sword (Heb. 4:12). It is by the Word of God that I have been reminded of the goodness of the Lord and have had my hope restored. The truth of God‘s Word has taken an ax to the very root of the source of my insecurities. It cut away the layers of the enemy’s agenda. 

This Sword, the Word of God, defends me against the very onslaught and attack of the enemy. When the lies come on in the form unholy attachments and generational curses, just a flash of this sword’s bright blade turns back the troops of darkness.

It is written, “When the enemy comes in like a flood, the Spirit of the Lord raises up a standard against it” (Isa. 59:19). This Standard is the Word, The same Word that Jesus used in the wilderness, it is the same power and very presence of the Almighty God. 

We have been given this Sword in our hands because we have been chosen and made one of his own.

Be The Light

After a long season of darkness and uncertainty, I believe all of us are finding the need to be re-centered, grounded, and focused. With so many choices thrown at us through online messages, print and video media, and perhaps even our faith communities, what or how do we choose best to proceed? 

Well I have found that we base our decisions from the vantage point of our own perceptions which can be distorted. We make choices from a place of need and our personal goals.

But is it what God wants? Is it the best course of action for those we love and want the best for? Will our choices bear the most fruit with an everlasting impact?

It’s easy to slip into a quiet rebellion – going about life in our own way. But the time comes when you and I will have to choose who or what will control us. The choice is ours. Will it be God, or our limited personality, or another imperfect substitute? Once we have chosen to be controlled by God’s  Spirit, let’s reaffirm our choices every day.*

Joshua, the Hebrew leader said to the Israelites, “But if it is unpleasing in your sight to serve the LORD, then choose for yourselves this day whom you will serve, whether the gods your fathers served beyond the Euphrates, or the gods of the Amorites in whose land you are living. As for me and my house, we will serve the LORD!” (Joshua 24:15)

I heard a preacher/teacher once say, “Whatever you do for Christ will succeed.”

“Lord God, help us to choose rightly. We know what’s out there and we know that you are a God of love, so help us to be the light, and help us to move forward. Jesus be glorified, in your name we pray, amen.”

* The Life Application Bible, and NIV, Tyndale House Publishers, 1988

New life, new Hope

 Psalm 51:13-17

Then I will teach transgressors your way, and sinners will turn back to you. Save me from blood guilt, oh God, the God who saves me, and my tongue will sing of your righteousness. Oh Lord, open my lips, and my mouth will declare your praise. You do not delight in sacrifice, or I would bring it; you do not take pleasure and burnt offerings. The sacrifices of God are a broken spirit; a broken and contrite heart, O God, you will not despise.

I was broken. I had spent many years living a sinful life and the darkness finally caught up with me. I was sin-sick; a smoldering wick. I cried heartbroken tears. But God promised to heal my broken heart. In his word he says, “a smoldering wick he will not extinguish”, (Isaiah 42:3). Instead, his love blew on my dying embers and by his Holy Spirit, brought forth new light and life. 

Prayer 

Lord God, thank you for your promise to forgive us and with this amazing love bring us back to life, in Jesus name we pray, amen.

Happy New Season!

Henri Nouwen wrote, ”Celebration...is the unceasing affirmation that underneath all the ups and downs of life there flows a solid current of joy." 

Reflecting back to this time last year, many of us were  anticipating that 2020 would be a season of focus, vision, and clarity. What the year turned out to be was more divergence, uncertainty, and darkness. What a contrast! But was it? 

It is said that when the heat is turned up what’s really in the pot will boil to the top. In the Bible, Proverbs 17:3 reads, “A crucible for silver and a furnace for gold, but the Lord is the tester of hearts.” Could it be that what was disguised with good manners and decorum has been revealed? Racism and rebellion that was always there was uncovered and deadly differences of opinion and biases drew the limelight and was centerstage for all to see.

So 2020 indeed was a year of vision and seeing with glaring clarity what was really in the hearts and minds of men and women. I want to look back and ask myself  how did I respond to the pandemic. What was my reaction to my job loss, the mask mandate, and stay at home orders? I believe that what has truly been in the heart - particularly in the Church, the government, and within our families, has been revealed in 2020. So how do we respond?

May I suggest the answer is for each of us to individually reflect - with a heart of compassion, gentleness, and empathy towards ourselves, the lessons learned and allow Love and hope to take root and guide us forward. I am certain that if we move too quickly into 2021 without reflecting deeply upon 2020's unexpectedness, its losses, the tears shed, and the experiences shared, we are destined to repeat it. 

Therefore, let this new beginning truly be a season of planting seeds of love, of peace and of encouragement. Happy New Year and may the Lord bless you and keep you, may His face shine upon you and be gracious to you and may He give you His peace (Numbers 6:24-26).

Seeds of light, 

Allison

Summertime Growth

Walking in the Arboretum this morning, I noticed the new growth of budding flowers, expanding shrubs, and towering trees. Fruit, now ripe, was ready to pick and newborn, Peacock chicks, skipped beside their mothers through the sprawling grass. As I passed by a pond, I looked at the algae that brimmed along the banks, as flies buzzed around the fermenting moss.

On this mid-summer day I realized how much growth there is when the temperature rises. When the autumn and winter solstice turns the leaves brown, the air cool, and the streams slow to a frozen trickle, the earth becomes dormant and little change occurs. But, in the warmth of the summer, there is much growth.

I notice myself, my shadow, and my outline as I come around a bend on the path and recognize I too have grown. In the days where I contended in the most heated battles, the fight for faith and struggles for endurance, in retrospect, these have been the seasons of the most growth and the greatest yield of fruit. 

So be it. These are the hot days of summer, the season of summertime growth.

(James 1:12)

Love always...

I know the world whispers in your ear that what you possess defines who you are, and that your appearance determines your worth. This is a lie, My love. Every shade, shape, and color reflects My glory. 

Know that the generations to come will not remember you for the efforts you placed on your outward appearance or for the things you accumulated but for what you gave and for Who you reflected inwardly. In fact, the harder you strive to perfect your image and to have more things, the more fearful and insecure you will be about who you really are and why you are ultimately here. 

I am in you and you are in Me. I will give you all that you need. Now go and walk through this life in complete confidence that I have uniquely equipped you with all you will ever need to impact the world and the lives of those around you.

Love always,

Your King and your Confidence

Violent Force or Passive Aggression?

I saw a sermon last night by a Pastor’s son who has been in leadership for many years in Los Angeles. His message was a call to a passive response regarding the recent events of police brutality upon Black people. He ascribed to the methods of nonviolent protest saying instead we should pray.

Apostle Stephen Gardener said “The seat of the Intercessor is one of authority and power.
We also know the Word says “Men ought always to pray” (Luke 18:1). I believe that prayer changes things and scripture also says that “So, too, faith without works is dead” (James 2:17).

However, those of us not called to the front lines on the streets still have a part to play and an effort to contribute and it is on the front lines of the Heavenlies. The recent developments in the Black Lives Matter movement show us that protest brings a climate for change. I strongly feel therefore, I must have action with my passion. So let’s march and let us also pray, for it is written, “The kingdom of God suffers violence (force) and the violent (forceful, unrelenting, committed, and passionate) take it by force (Matthew 11:12).

Finding Confidence in the Lord

Since the news of the corona virus has called for county-wide shutdowns and for everyone to stay indoors, I have begun to feel the effects of 'cabin-fever'. So, I have hiked 10 miles, baked a dozen chocolate-chip cookies, cooked one pot of homemade chili, and began to study the conversion of the metric system. Yes, the need to stay active both physically and mentally during these weeks of self-quarantine has called for creativity and intentionality. Still, keeping busy to stave off boredom and to just "stay out of the refrigerator", as I combat feelings of anxiety while experiencing empty store shelves, and hearing of fake vaccines, has truly become wearisome.

How does this speak to shame and rejection? I take heart in His promise to neither leave me nor forsake me. (Heb. 13:5)

The Word says to, "Be strong and of good courage" (Josh. 1:18). So today, I take comfort in the Lord;
and although I do not know when I will return to work and the end of this pandemic is no where in sight, my peace and confidence is in Him.

May you too find rest and a space of grace today and in the days and weeks to come.

My flesh and heart may fail, but God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever.
(Ps. 73:26)

Fear versus Faith

The threat of coronavirus, shortages of supplies in the marketplace, lacking healthcare,  unemployment, our US presidential candidates battling it out, and road rage, There’s a lot in our news headlines that let us know- on a 24 hour basis - there’s much at stake.

However, panics and pandemics are not new to mankind. Jesus even spoke about trouble to come when He was here on earth. In Mark 13:7, Jesus said to his disciples,“But when you hear of wars and rumors of wars, do not be troubled; for such things must happen, but the end is not yet.”  He went on to say, “Countries will fight each other; kingdoms will attack one another. There will be earthquakes everywhere, and there will be famines. These things are like the first pains of childbirth” (Mark‬ ‭13:8‬).

Therefore, we have a choice; with so much to be concerned about, we may choose to be in fear or walk in faith. The Lord said through the prophet Isaiah, ”Fear not for I am with you; do not be dismayed for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with My righteous right hand (Isa. 54:10).

So, with this great promise and assurance, how can we fret, hoard supplies and speak of impending doom?  In these last days we need to come together as Brethren and not fear one another lest we “ catch something” or “lose something”. If God is for us then who or what can be against us?

For it is written, “Though the mountains be shaken and the hills be removed, yet my unfailing love for you will not be shaken nor my covenant of peace be removed,” says the Lord, who has compassion on you.

Father, thank You that there is no fear in You, but peace and provision. You are Jehovah Jireh, our provider. In Jesus name, amen.

2020: The Year of Clear Vision, A Year of Hope

As the new year rolls out and we settle into our resolutions or resolve not to have resolutions, I am finding the word 'hope' just about everywhere. First, the theme of the Rose Parade was hope and the meditations on just about every prayer app are focusing on hope. Hope is that thing that gets you up in the morning. Keeps you on the job, in the relationship and committed to the goal. 

Therefore, I propose that what we all need most in the new year is hope. We require optimism and faith in order to move forward in our lives. However, being optimistic may be easier said than done. For example, the writer of Proverbs wrote, "Hope deferred makes the heart sick, but a dream fulfilled is a tree of life", (Proverbs 13:12). Therefore, having an anchor of expectation is integral to obtain forward movement, progress, and to thrive.

Sometimes we just need to talk ourselves into hope. I have found that there is no better way to do that than by reading the Word of God. Meditate on these verses of hope. 
Psalm 33:22, Psalm 39:7, Lamentations 3:24, Psalm 130:5 (Courtesy JM Ministries)

H Have
O Optimistic
P Perspectives in
E Everything 

Happy New Year!

Pastors and Dependency

Being a spiritual leader comes with a significant amount of authority and power. So it might come as a surprise that many pastors feel that they have very little authority and are powerless over many things.

Pastors who find themselves in this predicament tend to be overly dependent on others for how they feel about themselves and how they handle challenges. They give other people power over their emotions, thoughts and behaviors and depend heavily on people for approval and a sense of self-worth.

One telltale sign of over dependence is blaming others for how one feels. Dependent people will say things like “He made me angry” or “She ruined my day.” No one can make you feel anything. But that is exactly what happens with people who have a dependent personality. They let other people control their feelings. “When we “give away” to someone else the ability to make us feel a certain way, then we give away our personal power over our own lives. In doing that we also lose touch with our personal responsibility for our thoughts, feelings, and behavior” (Gary L. Harbaugh, Pastor As Person, p. 108).

For pastors, this can have a detrimental effect on them personally and professionally. Allowing others to control how we feel and think will influence how we handle the challenges of ministry. Fear of conflict, fear of change and fear of broken relationships will drive a dependent pastor to avoid or deny issues that come up. Fear – and the resentment and pain that tends to come with it – will also affect how pastors interact with church members. To overcome unhealthy dependencies, pastors must recover their authority and power over their feelings by depending on God, not people, for their sense of value and acceptance.

Alicia Grey, seminary student

Pastors and their feelings

            

             Anger, fear, anxiety and sadness are all human emotions. There tends to be an unspoken rule, however, that pastors should never express any of these feelings. These kinds of negative feelings are viewed as a sign of weakness or incompetence in a pastor.

            Where does this belief come from? Often times, it can be traced back to the way the pastor was raised. Perhaps, he or she was brought up in a home where their parents discouraged certain feelings. They grew up having to suppress their anger or fear. This dynamic can sometimes be found in seminary, too. There, the future pastors encounter a message that tells them how a pastor should or should not feel. The pastor is then left feeling guilty about harboring certain feelings or in denial that she or he has any “bad” feelings at all.

            Avoiding or denying his or her feelings has a tremendous impact on the pastor and everyone around him or her. “The pastor who denies or does not integrate into ministry his or her own feelings of hurt, or who is perceived as woundless, will also be perceived as “someone who has never been there,” says Gary L. Harbaugh, in his book Pastor as Person. He warns that pastors are in danger of losing touch with what it means to be a person when they refuse to acknowledge their feelings. 

           God created us to be holistic: physical, social, emotional and mental. Denying any of these aspects of our personhood restricts pastors from fully living and experiencing God’s healing power. It also limits the pastor’s ability to minister effectively to others. However, when pastors address their own feelings instead of hiding them, they are better able to handle a crisis, love themselves and connect and empathize with others.

By Alicia Grey, seminary student

Pastors and their Health

2/14/19

            Most people who become pastors do so because they believe that God called them to the ministry. This is key because no one should become a pastor if he or she simply sees it as a career. You will quickly become frustrated, resentful and overwhelmed, which will affect your ability to care for yourself and your congregation.

            But even people who are confident that God called them, still find themselves under the tremendous pressure of being a spiritual leader. There is so much more to being a pastor than preaching on Sunday mornings. Among many other things, they are also overseeing committee meetings and church ministries, visiting the sick and the dying, counseling individuals, doing weddings and funerals and leading social justice efforts.  

Sadly, many pastors tend to ignore, deny or downplay the toll their work has on their physical health. Gary L. Harbaugh, in his book Pastor as Person, says that pastors are quick to encourage their parishioners to take care of themselves. They will not, however, heed their own advice. “The same pastor might also preach from the pulpit that the body is the temple of the Holy Spirit. But when it comes to himself or herself, the pastor tends to forget that he or she is an embodied person” (Harbaugh, p. 48). Stating that pastors have a body might seem obvious, but it is worth emphasizing. So often, church members - and society - put pastors on a pedestal and view them as superheroes, forgetting that they are humans with the same needs as anyone else. It is no wonder then that so many pastors have at least a 50 percent chance of seeing a change in their health (Harbaugh, p. 42).

So what can a pastor do? For starters, they must admit that they need help and then be intentional in seeking it out. Help could come in the form of a clergy support group, self-care activities and counseling. When pastors take care of themselves, everyone benefits.

By Alicia Grey, seminary student

She Wields A Sword

Journal

A Year in Retrospect

So, go ahead—let everyone know it!

   Tell the world how he broke through

   and delivered you from the power of darkness and has gathered us together from all over the world. He has set us free to be his very own!

Psalm 107:2-3 (TPT)

This year started with a bang, a bang to the head that is. I found myself having to reckon with my assumptions and what I discovered was that one cannot assume they completely understand or comprehend prophetic words or even impressions we feel we’ve received from the Lord. So when circumstances did not materialize the way I envisioned, I was disillusioned. Thus, what then shaped my year to follow was discouragement, disheartenment, and dismay. To sum it up, this year, I was depressed!

Now on hold on, don’t go yet, I write about these Four Deadly ‘D’s in a journal devoted to “wielding a sword” and empowerment, not to focus on the negative but to expose in a very vulnerable way what can go wrong when you want everything to go right, and how by the Grace of God, we once again may have a renewed vision of hope, get reestablished confidence, and obtain restored freedom.  

Our humanity cries out for deliverance and statistics reveal that more and more people in our culture are experiencing the effects of some form of trauma or mental illness. Former Director of the National Institute of Mental Health Thomas Insel wrote about the commonality of mood disorders. “Our best estimate of the number of adults with any diagnosable mental disorder within the past year is nearly 1 in 5, or roughly 43 million Americans. Therefore, what happened to me was not uncommon. Still, as a Believer I would like to think that I had enough faith or “Word in me” to side step it.

However, what I did not see coming was the shocking revelation of my own naivety that I could be all things, at all times, to everyone. And what added insult to injury, I mistakenly called this, ‘ministry’.  It is not the loss of a belief system that crushes but the doused illusion of being on point that hit below the belt.

Therefore, compounded by my own failings to set appropriate boundaries, I blamed people in authority, the Church and even the Lord, and that nearly stripped me of all of my faith. I did not know it at the time, but looking back, the real issue was my inability to rest and rest in the Lord.

Rest is the element that sustains when the going gets tough. It is the life of the Spirit within that compels us to move forward, to go up, to go on and to not give up. King David wrote,

“My soul finds rest in God alone. He alone is my rock and salvation. My hope comes from God alone. And He alone is my rock” (Psalm 62:1-2 NIV).

The Hebrew word rest conveys the idea of silence, of being quiet, of being still. It’s related to the idea of Psalm 46 “Be still and know that I am God.” It’s related to the words of Jesus: “Peace, be still.” Thus, this is what I needed - rest.

In retrospect, why was I so surprised at the painful trials I was experiencing, as if something strange was happening to me? It wasn’t strange at all but the hand of God faithfully working all things out for my good and bringing me back, full circle. Christ was giving me and still is, beauty for ashes. He’s restored my Spirit-filled hope, renewed my God-inspired confidence, and reignited my Christ-bought and won freedom.  Hallelujah!

Merry Christmas Beloved, and have a very happy, restful and hope-filled New Year!

Elizabeth-Marie ‘Allison’ on December 24, 2018

She Wields A Sword

Sierra Madre, CA, 91024